THE THESMOPHORIAZUSÆ
A monologue from the
play by Aristophanes
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NOTE: This monologue is reprinted
from Aristophanes: The Eleven Comedies. Trans. Anonymous.
London: The Athenian Society, 1922. |
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FIRST WOMAN: If I have asked to speak, may the goddesses
bear me witness, it was not for sake of ostentation. But I have
long been pained to see us women insulted by this Euripides,
this son of the grocer-woman, who loads us with every kind of
indignity. Has he not hit us enough, columniated us sufficiently,
wherever there are spectators, tragedians, and a chorus? Does
he not style us lecherous, drunken, traitorous, boastful? Does
he not repeat that we are all vice, that we are the curse of
our husbands? So that, directly they come back from the theatre,
they look at us doubtfully and go searching every nook, fearing
there may be some hidden lover. We can do nothing as we used
to, so many are the false ideas which he has instilled into our
husbands. Is a woman weaving a garland for herself? 'Tis because
she is in love. Does she let some vase drop while going or returning
to the house? Her husband asks her in whose honour she has broken
it, "It can only be for that Corinthian stranger."
Is a maiden unwell? Straightway her brother says, "That
is a colour that does not please me." And if a childless
woman wishes to substitute one, the deceit can no longer be a
secret, for the neighbors will insist on being present at her
delivery. Formerly the old men married young girls, but they
have been so columniated that none of think of them now, thanks
to the verse: "A woman is the tyrant of the old man who
marries her." Again, it is because of Euripides that we
are incessantly watched, that we are shut up behind bolts and
bars, and that dogs are kept to frighten off the gallants. Let
that pass; but formerly it was we who had the care of the food,
who fetched the flour from the storeroom, the oil and the wine;
we can do it no more. Our husbands no carry little Spartan keys
on their persons, made with three notches and full of malice
and spite. Formerly it sufficed to purchase a ring marked with
the same sign for three obols, to open the most securely sealed-up
door; but now this pestilent Euripides has taught men to hang
seals of worm-eaten wood about their necks. My opinion, therefore,
is that we should rid ourselves of our enemy by poison or by
any other means, provided he dies. That is what I announce publicly;
as to certain points, which I wish to keep secret, I propose
to record them on the secretary's minutes.
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MONOLOGUES BY ARISTOPHANES |
