THE DOCTOR IN SPITE OF HIMSELF
A monologue from the
play by Molière
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NOTE: This monologue is reprinted
from The Dramatic Works of Molière, Vol. II. Ed.
Charles Heron Wall. London: George Bell & Sons, 1898. |
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SGANARELLE: No, I tell you; they made a doctor of me
in spite of myself. I had never dreamt of being so learned as
that, and all my studies came to an end in the lowest form. I
can't imagine what put that whim into their heads; but when I
saw that they were resolved to force me to be a doctor, I made
up my mind to be one at the expense of those I might have to
do with. Yet you would hardly believe how the error has spread
abroad, and how everyone is obstinately determined to see a great
doctor in me. They come to fetch me from right and left; and
if things go on in that fashion, I think I had better stick to
physic all my life. I find it the best of trades; for, whether
we are right or wrong, we are paid equally well. We are never
responsible for the bad work, and we cut away as we please in
the stuff we work on. A shoe maker in making shoes can't spoil
a scrap of leather without having to pay for it, but we can spoil
a man without paying one farthing for the damage done. The blunders
are not ours, and the fault is always that of the dead man. In
short, the best part of this profession is, that there exists
among the dead an honesty, a discretion that nothing can surpass;
and never as yet has one been known to complain of the doctor
who had killed him.
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