THE MISER
A monologue from the
play by Molière
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NOTE: This monologue is reprinted
from The Dramatic Works of Molière, Vol. III. Ed.
Charles Heron Wall. London: George Bell & Sons, 1891. |
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JACQUES: Since you wish it, Sir, I will tell you frankly
that you are the laughing-stock of everybody; that they taunt
us everywhere by a thousand jokes on your account, and that nothing
delights people more than to make sport of you, and to tell stories
without end about your stinginess. One says that you have special
almanacs printed, where you double the ember days and vigils,
so that you may profit by the fasts to which you bind all your
house; another, that you always have a ready-made quarrel for
your servants at Christmas time or when they leave you, so that
you may give them nothing. One tells a story how not long since
you prosecuted a neighbor's cat because it had eaten up the remainder
of a leg of mutton; another says that one night you were caught
stealing your horses' oats, and that your coachman--that is the
man who was before me--gave you, in the dark, a good sound drubbing,
of which you said nothing. In short, what is the use of going
on? We can go nowhere but we are sure to hear you pulled to pieces.
You are the butt and jest and byword of everybody; and never
does anyone mention you but under the names of miser, stingy,
mean fellow and userer.
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